Friday, October 2, 2009

Randomness at Random! #17 Pill Hill of Bill

As you may have noticed, my titles are often rhyming. If you have a problem with that I suggest you lock yourself in a closet for two days with nothing to do but read Doctor Sues books. Now...

Hue has just locked himself in the closet again. He also took some Sues books. So Bill will be the substitute creature.

CHAPTER ONE-SPILL BILL

Bill had a pill. Bill was a pill. Bill was in a mill. Bill loved Dill-pickles.

Bill was a scypopollynack. Scypopollynack's are people who are allergic to everything. As you can imagine, Bill had a lot of pills. He got them from Canada. Bill loved his pills. He named each one of them. Macky was his favorite.
One day Bill went out for a bubble walk. Bill had to be in a bubble all his life since he was allergic to everything. Using the toilet was tough. I t involved a vacuum. While Bill was walking he had the sudden urge to use the lavatory. He was going home to get the vacuum when he heard a sudden pop come from a bush a little way away. There was a person in it. He kept saying that he was a bush, not a person, and would rather be left in peace to his photosynthesis. Bill agreed and walked on. He suddenly pulled down his pants and collapsed into a violent fit of giggling and passed out while peeing himself and barfing. His bubble had been popped by the bushes thorn so that non-ventilated air rushed in and paralysed Bill with the sudden allergic reaction. The bush had used a needle...

CHAPTER TWO-DAZE HAZE

Bill woke up naked in toilet. Well, he was naked, but Bill wasn't in a toilet, he was in a pool on top of a surgery table. Eww. He leaped up and slapped himself. What? He didn't mean to do that. ???ZZZZZ Bill had passed out again.
Now Bill was in a bubble, naked except for a bikini, with a target drawn on his cheeks. Which ever pair of cheeks you chose is up to you. ZZZZZ??????
He was a pig. ZZZZZ?????
Bill finally stopped hallucinating and stood up. He was missing his beloved Macky....

CHAPTER THREE- WHY GUY

Bill raced across the side walk to his house. He needed a vacuum.
After a good clean break, Bill went home for no reason at all. There were a few clowns there who gaged him and ripped his clothes off. Great, he was naked again. One clown poked him in the kidney and watched as a hole appeared in it.
Bill had been told everything. The bush had tranqed him, took his pill and his kidney and was going to use it as a weapon. Not like he was gunna shoot people with a kidney. It was a bio-bomb. and only Bill could stop it for some un-shared reason. He thought the clown were just too chicken to kill the bush. The clowns were WTHAWPSASOFATTIMTWIOAS agents. (why the heck are we performing such a stupid operation for a terrorist treat I mean threat? why is or acronim so long?)
Bill's pill was the last enlarging pill ever.
They were sending him in...

CHAPTER FOUR- PILL HILL

Bill fell out of the plane. Actually he was pushed. Anyway. Bill landed on a hill. After a minute or so, the hill exploded. It was actually a temple. There was a bush inside. It was lighting fireworks. How over dramatic. The temple was filled with pills. Even one the size of a whale. (Bill named it Bessie) The big pill exploded with confetti. A party. Weird. The bush had a rock. No, it was a kidney. It was Bill's kidney. The bush shoved it into a pan, then added some more ingredients to it. One was thumbtacks. He then but Bill's pill in the pan. He drank the concoction. Eww. Bill didn't know what to do. it was already to late. He had drank the bile. The bush grew. It was the size of a skyscraper. Bill peed on it. it was what the WTHAWPSASOFATTIMTWIOAS agents had told him to do. The bush shrank. It was the size of a pea. As in vegetable. And that was that. Done. Bill's pee was the antidote to the enlarging pill. DONE.

-Sorry for the dry climax, it was late at night when I wrote this-

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