Randomnness at Random! #15 The Tale of Three Words

Well, since MELISSA was a mallard on stilts i an going to write tree words. THREE WORDS. there.

Randomness at Random! #15 The Tale of Three Words

If you have read The Tales of Beadle the Bard or just like fairy tale stories you will like this post.

One word was WHOSIT another was WHYSTHAT and the last was WHATSGOINGON. The words were traveling and they came to a river. Instead of trying to cross it they look around and find a bridge. They go over to it. They see DEATH. DEATH is angry at WHOSIT, WHYSTHAT, and WHATSGOINGON for not trying to cross the river without the bridge because they would have died and DEATH would love another soul to add to his SOULBAG. But DEATH tricks WHOSIT, WHYSTHAT, and WHATSGOINGON, and acts like he is happy for them cheating him out of a perfectly dry soul. He gives them each a wish. WHOSIT asks for a licorice stick that would grow when you ate it. WHYSTHAT asked for a nut that would let you see through walls. WHATSGOINGON asked for a blanket that would turn you into an animal when you put it on. Two days later... WHOSIT is killed for the price of his never ending licorice stick. One month later... WHYSTHAT kills himself for seeing the horrors of what gos on inside a McDonalds Employees Only door. Sixty years later... WHATSGOINGON dies of natural pigeon causes... DEATH is happy. But SOULBAG gets the swine flu and barfs up eight-hundred years worth of souls, but the souls have trouble getting into the country because their passports were taken when they were "deposited" in SOULBAG. So DEATH is so angry with himself that he pulls a comacazzy and kills himself. So there is no one to shove him in the bag and SOULSBAG gets backed up like a toilet and the SUPERNATURALPLUMBERS have to unclog him. Sewage.

The moral is to ask for a "GET OUT OF DEATH FREE" Coupon.

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince Review

HOLY MY GREAT MOTHERS PANTS! I FORGOT!

REVIEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Melissa! Thank you to DEATH!!!!

I will now be writing reviews about random stuff! I'm hoping not to copy Melissa too much, but since it was the idea, I will start with harry Potter 6!

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince Review

As all movies based on books, they follow the plot line about as well as a blind man follows a flashing arrow. They are BAD! BUT Harry Potter 6 follows to plot the most out of any movie/book I've ever seen! I wanna HUG it! Save for the end battle and a few minor things, it follows the book perfectly! Also in this instalment, Harry's character is less moody and angry. HOORAY! His 'tude was really getting to me. And sense the plot gets much darker, Harry inserts much more comic relief. HOORAY! The hocus-pocus in this movie is still stellar! But, the drama gets much better, and really makes this movie stand out!

That is all, good night, until next time! I hope. Ahhhh! (Sorry Random)

The First Bi-CentenContenetenial-Perinial Address

Hello nation! I am announcing my unretirement (that was never official) as blogger! I pulled a Brett Farve! So I don't have time RIGHT now, but I will blog soon! So Good Night!

Game Bonanza!!!!!!!!!

Durring my tech camp I have made quite a few games for you to check out. So go to http://scratch.mit.edu/users/Screecher34 for all of my awsome creations. Just don't mess things up though... If you want to see how I made my games or make your own, download Scratch and click the download all sprites and scrpits of game in the uper right corner when you have selected a game. Ta ta!

The History of Fireworks

According to several resources: Fireworks were thought to be made about 2,000 years ago when a Chinese cook accidentally mixed sulfur, charcoal, and saltpeter together, making a primitive gunpowder. He stuck the mix in a bamboo tube and lit it. It exploded, blowing the bamboo to bits, thus the first Fire Cracker. “Huo yao” was the name the Chinese gave the cooks explosive concoction, it means “Fire chemical” in Chinese, but it was the Italians who made the fountains and sky-high colorful displays you see today possible. Fireworks also brought the end to the medieval style of warfare as impenetrable walls of castles could be blown to bits with a cannon.

For more information on Fireworks check out http://www.ch.ic.ac.uk/local/projects/gondhia/lightcolour.html

Current Events

Micheal Jackson's dead........
Ferra Faucett's dead.......



.....That sucks.

Well, I'm not sure I have much more to say......

so.......


....Darn.




Also! If you have not watched Ferra's Story on the televison, I will be the reporter on her last struggle, because Ferra's death would be all over the news if it wasn't for Micheal Jackson dieing.

Here we go...

Ferra Faucett was one of the angels in Charlie's Angels, and was on one of the most famous posters of the 80's.

Two years ago Ferra was diagnosed with various very unpleasn't cancers. After two and a half years of ceemo, she died. END OF STORY

Mental Note

Hello viewers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know I have been behind on posting for a while, but I've been on vacation, so hack me some slack. Just kidding. I love you guys! A special thanks to you two people who have stuck with me for a long while: Mr.Baatz and Melissa. I'm at tech camp right now, so I have made a webside now. Go to http://www.rivfc.org/spintheweb/dane ! But, first, let me warn you, it's super,super,super,super,super,super,super,super,
super,super,super,super,super,super,super,super,super,super,super,super,



Stupid.

So have fun! Bye!

Randomness at Random # whatever I think it's 14 The Diary of Dairy

OKAY MELISSA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M POSTING ANOTHER THINGY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LIKE WRITING IN ALL CAPS AND PUTTING LOTS OF EXCLAMATION POINTS ON THE PAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!JUST A FEW MORE FOR GOOD MEASURE!!!!!!!


!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay. I'm done.

Though I am very sorry for not posting for a while.

Randomness at Random # 14 The Dairy Diary

There once was a boy name Hue. He kept a diary, unlike most boys. But unlike most diaries, this one was about dairy. Cheese, yogurt, milk and the like, all alphabetical categorized on taste, product, company, and thesis.
One day Hue's brother, Herald, stole his Dairy Diary. Hue chased him down, and in the end, Herald poked him with a thumb tack. Hue started to bleed...milk. Hue drank and ate so many dairy products, that he secreted milk when injured. Herald got a pin and stuck it right in Hue's belly. KKKKKKKKKKKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRBBBBBBBBBBBBB
BBBBBBBBBBBBBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMFF
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!
!!!!
!!
!


!!!!!!!!!

!

SORRY, GOT A BIT CARRIED AWAY WITH THE BIG-OOPS!-Letters.........

Hue exploded and popped like a balloon, spewing milk everywhere with a sound like a Hue-PUNs-mungous fart.
Along with that, Hue's Dairy Diary vanished with a puff of Parmesan cheese. And Hue was never smelled again......


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?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
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?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

WHAT THE HECK???!!!!

How are you?

I'm no longer a sixth grader, and all of my viewers, or readers, have probably forgotten about this blog. So if you, Mr.Baatz, or anyone else (Melissa) are still watching this blog, please leave a comment so that I know your out there. I'll keep posting!

Mike the Headless Nicken, or Kraken, or Chicken

This weekend in Fruita, Colorado The Mike the Headless Chicken festival will be held.

In 1954 a farmer was beheading his season's chickens when one of his chickens stayed alive an unusually long time. he realized it was still alive the next day and decided to take it on the road for some profit. Scientist say that since the chickens brain stem was still intact and his esophagus was still functioning along with one ear, so Mike the Headless Chicken lived, though he had to be fed with a syringe and gooey foods.

This year the Mike the Headless Chicken Festival will be attracting some of the biggest crowds ever with art, music, Peep eating contests, chicken eating contests, and other chicken-themed games, plus other fun festival stuff.

So go there!

Wait! Too late! It took me too long to write this because I procrastinated, so the festival already happened........ 3 weeks ago.

I tire of this.

I'm a Growing

I used to talk in goos and gagas,
but now I talk in ain't nuthin's and un-ahs.
I used to like dinosaurs,
But now I like books and nature.
I used to be 3ft 4,
But now I am 5ft 1.
I used to need a kiss on my boo-boos,
But now I just say a few unpleasant words.
I used to hate artichoke,
But now I love it with cheese sauce.
I used to have to check my bed for monsters,
But now I just have to check the closet.
I used to be a kitten,
But now I have been reincarnated as a person-thing.

Hiccup Cure

Hello! This is the almost garunted hiccup cure! If you go to the website below and click "skip my ramblings and disclaimer" you will find the 30 second hiccup cure! I have hiccups often and this works! It may take a little curage, but it works! and add on to his instructions- breath deeply after "squeak." Good Luck!

http://www.cognitial.com/hiccups.asp#cure

30 Posts

I'm board beond measure, and this blog has reached 30 posts! So, I will be writing some sort of story today.

There once was a story that was so sad someone decided not to write it. THE END

Randomnness at Random! #13 Bad Luck Karma

Well, sinse this is Randomness at Random post # 13, I'll get stupertious on you. I mean superstious.

Hue was walking to the pet store to buy a fish to stick down his worst enemy's pants, when a black cat walked by. Imedeatly, a chicken coop fell off a nearby roof and crushed Hue under 100 pounds of hen, poop, and eggs. He crawled out, and since the rotton luck had put him in a bad mood, he decided to get a tarantula for the pants instead. He was at the local dinner, Aunt Shela's, who hadn't been inspected for health code in twenty years, when he spilled the salt. A cottage cheese truck then crashed into the side of the building and spewed its contents all over Hue and the other customers. By this time Hue was getting worried. So, to test if it was bad luck, he went to the mirror store and broke the Grand Mirror. "You brake it you buy it," so Hue forked over $170. The ground started to rumble. a crack the size of a semi opened in the Earth where Hue was standing. Then it was gone along with Hue. Hue's face turned up on milk cartons across the nation. "Have you seen this boy?" But that wouldn't do him good. He was at the center of the Earth right now, making reed woven wallets for Wal-Mart. Sorry Hue.

Armadillo Milking Weekly

The Weekly Armadillo Milking

How to Armadillo Milk

By: Gary Summers

Well I'll be griddle, fried and baked. You want to Armadillo Milk. Well here's how:
Strip down to your tighty whiteys and rub yourself with jelly 'cause this may get sticky. Grab a bottle of Elmer's Glue, a balloon, spatula, mouthwash, bird seed, ammonia, one tricycle complete with get-to driver, a straw, mittens, alcohol (for sanitising), and a clothes pin.

Step (1) Find an armadillo.

Step (2) Put on your safety mittens.

Step (3) Sanitize the mittens with the alcohol.

Step (4) Remember to do the next steps quickly to avoid injury.

Step (5) Flip the armadillo over with a spatula.

Step (6) Rub some glue around a spot on the armadillo's underside.

Step (7) Stick the straw into the belly in the area with the glue so that the glue seals the straw to the skin so that you don't loose any milk.

Step (8) Attach a balloon to the straw.

Step (9) Blow into the armadillo's mouth as if you were giving him CPR. The pressure will push the milk into the balloon for collecting. Blow until all milk is out.

Step (10) Give the armadillo some mouthwash before yourself. (Be courteous)

Step (11) Now take some mouthwash for yourself.

Step (12) Remove straw and balloon.

Step (13) Close balloon with clothes pin to prevent leakage.

Step (14) Glue the area of the armadillo's belly shut where you put the straw in.

Step (15) Administer some ammonia to the armadillo so that he is unconscious while you escape to avoid injury.

Step (16) Spred some bird seed around so that the armadillo will have something to eat once he wakes up. Getting milked makes you hungry.

Step (17) Push off the get-to driver from the tricycle and peddle away to freedom.

The armadillo will have accumulated more milk in about 2 months. A health armadillo should contain 2 gallons of milk. Keep armadillos in colonies off about 200 with one queen. Make sure to mark the queen with a purple or blue dot, so as to keep track of it. Armadillos are to be kept in sheets. Keep the sheets in a white box. A buzzing should come from the box when the armadillos are happy. Give them lots of flowers to pollinate. The "milk" produced is actually honey. For more information on keeping your armadillos in a healthy condition, go to http://www.beekeppingfornewbs.org/

Now that you know how to Milk Armadillos, you can add a variety of jobs that you will be qualified for to your resume'. Happy Milking!

Advertisement: Improved titanium straws at Armadillo Milking General Store. Only $17.83.

Expert's Tales: Mad Armadillo Disease

Armadillo Milkers Brad Falco, Lit Grendle, and Greg Wumblo were up in Toronto ,Canada when a crop duster flew over the group of wild armadillos they were milking. The one they were just gluing sneezed and turned green in the eyes. "It started to chew my shirt and all of the sudden it was tearing off my hair," remembers Brad. "Then the whole group of them got red in the eyes too." The group of armadillos then attacked Falco, Grendle, and Wumblo. The enraged armadillos tore off all of their hair and started to pummel them. After 20 minutes of being pummeled, the experts reached their get-to tricycles. "I'm glad I took that class on get-to driver pushing techniques, " reports Grendle. "it probably saved my arm pit hair." They peddled away to the Motel 8 they had been staying at and received immediate medical assistance. Lit, and Brad both had rabies and received a shot. All three of them were admitted out the next day. "I'm still going to keep Armadillo Milking though, I couldn't make a living any other way," said Greg Wumblo even though they are hairless to this day.

If you have seen any armadillos with green eyes, get inside, check your hair to make sure it is safe, and call us immediately at 1-800-898-MILK. More information on Mad Armadillo Disease will be coming soon. Or visit http://www.armadillomilking.org/madarmadillodisease.

Tip of the Week-Make sure to have your get-to tricycle equipped with training wheels.

This Week's Casualties-13

Armadillo Milking Weekly Premier

With Henry's (of Henry's Happy House) Squirrel Farming magazine getting top notch ratings, I had to make my own rip-off of it. I will now be writing a magazine article on Armadillo Milking that is proclaimed to be weekly, but don't expect it. So, enjoy the scribblings!

No Bias. Bull!

Hello, I'm an enraged "Liberal" and I will be ranting to you today. I was just watching the Bob O' Riley Show, in which he claims to be un-bias. He then calls "Liberals" and I quote, "so stupid that they're dangerous," and "nuts." Well then, I must be an Cashew. And my family almonds, walnuts, peanuts, and pistachios. And I have just called myself a "Liberal" 'cause that's what all you far righties are going to deem me after reading this.

P.S. Susan Rogen just had a bad mess up/day as we all do, but since she's on national television with a successful semi-well know career which most of us don't have, she gets slammed. And now you all are going to write me off as a crack-pot-lunatic because I'm a "Rogen supporter". Well I'm not, I'm a nutty-whack-job.

So, as my first meaningless moral Internet outrage has come to a conclusion, I bid you farewell my little political activists of the third kind.

Play-Doh's History

1956 marks the day, I mean year, when the world's happiness level grew from moderately joyful to extremely cheerful. That was the year Play-Doh was released to the masses with! Noah and Joseph McVicker sent in a patent request, No. 3,167,440, for a "plastic modeling composition" that was originally planed to be a wall paper cleaner. Just like Silly Putty, its arch rival was also created by accident. Nearly 2 billion containers of Play-Doh have been sold already. At first, Play-Doh came in a 1.5lb cardboard cylinder in only one color: off-white.

Co-creator, Joseph McVicker, remembered how hard his school modeling clay was to manipulate, and how easy one of his non-toxic wall paper cleaner prototypes was. So, he decided to send a box of it over to his childhood school. It was a huge success. Sinse his invention was such a hit, he offered to supply the rest of the schools in the Cincinnati area with it too, getting an equally amazed reaction from them. Then, his product was showcased in a national educational convention. After that, department stores started to take a serious interest in the new modeling clay. With the help of his new company, "Rainbow Crafts", McVicker sold the first can in Woodward & Lothrop Department Store in Washington, D.C. The head of the 9 million pounds of Play-Doh to be sold over the next 50 years.

Over the next few years, modifications were made to the PLay-Doh recipe such as color and squishy properties. They also updater the PLay-Doh mascot's, Play-Doh Pete's, image. The cardboard can was made out of plastic too. And in 1991 the Play-Doh franchise was sold to Hasbro under the Playschool division. The exact formula for Play-Doh is carefully stowed in a safe location, but many common home-made recipes are out there. In 2000, Hasbro let people vote on their favorite Play-Doh colors. Over 100,000 people voted and the winners were rose red, purple paradise, blue lagoon, and garden green with many close runners up. Warren Brown from Food Network show "Sugar Rush" made an etible birthday cake mix of Play-Doh for it's 50th anniversary in 2006, Happy Birthday you creative, accident lucky, people.

The Gibbly Horm Monster

Wanted

The monster, Gibbly Horm, is wanted for mass trickery. The fiend is a mischievous character, he will stop at nothing to get the best of you. (By nothing I mean if you do nothing he'll stop. But people don't have the sense for that.) He is know as the Gibbering Worm. (Probably because most people can't pronounce his name correctly.) What Gibbly is know for most is: shutting the door you are about to walk through so that you walk into it.

Gibbly is about three and a half feet tall, he weighs about 40 pounds, and has a camel shaped body. His skin is purple, but the skin on his appendages is magenta. He has black, oval-shaped eyes and a slit for a nose. The Gibbering Worm has four arms and two legs. Don't mix up his head with his tail, which are both worm shaped. He is also renowned for being the only creature with floating eyebrows. It also has five slippery digits on each appendage.

The monster was last seen near Chicago, but we don't know where it is now, or where it will strike next. To catch Gibbly Horm get one mouse trap, some strawberries, and a cat carrier. Set up the strawberry on the mouse trap. (Gibbly Horm loves them.) So if the Gibbering Worm is near, he will go for the strawberry. Once trapped, put him in the cat carrier and take him to the Humane Society. The reward for catching Gibbly Horm is 100 Euro. We want it in the petting zoo!

If you see this creature, call 1-800-333-Worm

Storywork's Evil Assignment, My Past Life

This is for Storyworks, the silliest kids magazine in the world. A story about the earthquake of 1812, as prompted by Storyworks.

Oakaby, a tall 14 year old boy-thingy (this feels like I'm describing a felon) was playing with his hula-hoop, as he had been doing for the past 6 years, when the earthquake came. Before then, Oakaby's life in Portland had been relatively normal, boring, and back-braking. So when the Earth split open and the ground began to shake, Oakaby got quite a surrr-pras. in his panic, he thought the best thing to do would be to hide under his bed-thing. His mother thought that might be a bit less smart and instructed him to go outside. Once the "Hard Shock"' came on February 7, 1812, Oakaby got a hard shock. his mother (he didn't have a father) was crushed under falling rubble. Oakaby's matres-thing was thrown out the window, so he decided it would be safer on the water. So he took afloat on his matres-thing downstream. 2 days later he arrived in Olympia, Washington, where he met his foster parents, Nan and Gup.

See Storyworks!? See what you made me do!?

Randomness at Random! #12 The Answers of Dumb

Hue was taking a test on Geography when this story takes place. Here is the test and Hue's answers' below them. Hue's friend, Carl, filled in #2 for him, then Hue wrote in a comment on Carl's answer.

Geography Test

#1. What are the citizens of Italy called?

Uuummm...... Pastafarians? Like Rastafarians, but since they are in Italy they like pasta.

#2. Name a country that starts with an H.

Hungary.
No, in the world, Carl.

#3. Write a post card bleow as if you were in Spain?

Well, I'm having a just lovely time being insane now. I'm in this wonderful hotel they call the asylum. Oh, in Spain! Not insane! Gottcha.

#4. Where is the Sahara desert?

Sara'a dessert is in the fridge.

#5 True of false? This question is false.

"Gosh this test is hard!" said Huey. "I know how I'll get the answers right!"

Hue pulled out his cell phone.

"I'll just use my phone to hack Mrs. Dotty's computer and get the answers."

Hue started pressing random buttons on his phone, because the fact was; he didn't know how to hack a computer from a very suseptable cell phone. So he decided luck better smile on him today. :) (If you're wondering, that thing to the left of this is a smily Cirus face.) Wow was hue lucky! He actually got a screen to pop up that acctually looked like it might be on the right track. It said:

Hacking: Please wait... [

Hacking: Please wait...... [

Hacking: Please wait......... [

Hacking: Please wait............... [

Hacking: Please wait................... [

Hacking: Please wait.......................[ Hacking complete.

Hue looked at his phone. It had many incompreble letters on it. Hue just realized his phone had a bunch of incomperable letters on it. Hue had just hacked his own phone from his phone. Would you look at that? No? You wouldn't? Oh, well. Hue moaned a like a cow being milked with a steel brush. Then he went back to his test, answering each question with the same answer: Uuuuuuuu uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. ?????????????????????????????????????But, hay, it's for horses.

Hue receved his test the next day. It had the picture of someone barfing on it. Hue took that Mrs. Dotty thought his test was bad.

Randomnness at Random! #11 A Knock to the Head and Door

Ah! A fresh new post to mess up in many crooked and hilarious ways. Don't you love the feeling!? I do.

But Hue, didn't. In the start of this story, Hue took a rather nasty knock to the head when using a hammer to tidy his hair. Judging by the way Hue was using the hammer at the time of his accident, I think Hue has had many head injuries before this, but alas, there will most likely be more to come. Anyway, once Hue was brought home for the hospital, or as Hue called it: the Hostile Pittle, you could clearly see he wasn't thinking right. He put the jelly on his bread before the peanut butter when making a PB&J. Or as Hue called it, a peanut brittle and jerky sandwich.
But the most obvious evidence of his shenanigans, was this: -Knock knock- Someone was at the door. "Don't worry about the door Hue, I'll get it."

All Hue's mother got was an unidentifiable,"Mmmhughu."

Hue's mom, Tracy, answered the door.

"Why hello, Delores. It's lovely to see you." (I did that for you Melissa. Sorry other viewers,

you wouldn't get that Melissa thing.)

"How nice to see you too, Tracy. Just poppin' to see how Hue was doing."

"Oh, he's fine," said Tracy.

'Well good, I'll see you later then."

"Bye."

"Why didn't you answer the phone mom? It was ringing."

"What sweety? No it wasn't. Go back to sleep."

Hue slept for an hour and woke up at the ringing of the phone.

"Mom, get the door, somebody's here."

"Just a second the phone just rang."

"That was the door, mom. Answer it."

Tracy picked up the phone and chit-chatted with a friend for a while. Something wasn't right.

At 2:00 someone knocked on the door again. Instinctively, Hue picked up the phone.

"Hello?"

No one answered, just a dial tone. As you can see, Hue's konk on the head made him mix up the sounds of a knock at the door and the telephone ringing. Hue's mother tried to set him straight with a good whack of the newspaper to set him straight. Nothing happened. Everything Hue's parent's tried to put him back to normal failed. Even the doctors attempts to cure him fell short too. All they did was make him confuse the sounds of a car horn with the school bell. That was bad.

But the saddest thing of all, was that he never got Knock-Knock jokes again.

Randomnness at Random! Notice & #10 Port Potty, not Port-O-Potty

Notice: If you have noticed this notice reward yourself. (See Randomness at Random #9) Anyway, from now on our main character's name is Hue. As in Huey. Not 'hewy' like that's a bunch of hewy. But Hue as in Huey as in the name as in (Here's a little pronunciation for you) Heew-ee N. (The N. means name, not noun) The name of the main charter in this story from now on. It's a cool name. Now to the story.

Randomness at Random #10 Port Potty, not Port-O-Potty

P.S. Sorry for all the sort-of crude humor and potty jokes.

Huey, or Hue for short, is the guy's life you will be eavesdropping on today. You see, Huey didn't have a bathroom in his house. And as you might imagine, that is very inconvenient for him. So, on Friday, Hue went to buy a bathroom for his house. But seeing as he didn't have a car, only a bike, he thought it might be better to shop online. Http://http://www.toiletsforcheap/.com . This sit seemed a little more cheap than classy, featuring: the box toilet, so he decided to try another one. http://www.bedbathandbeyond.com/ was a little to sci-fi for him. http://www.mypootin seemed like a reasonable place to shop, so he clicked on it. Many wonderful choices popped up (sorry) or should I say pooped up, on-screen for Hue to choose from. The classic fuzzy seat, the outhouse, the porcelain express, the hole, the self cleaning, and the wheelchair accessible kind.
But the one that perky Huey's curiosity the most was the Port-O-Potty. Those big greenish-blueish Waste Management type. Of course he'd spruce it up with a "Home Sweet Port-O-Potty" sign and other features. He picked 1 day shipping he was so excited. Plus, I'd save a lot of trips to the gas station bathroom if he got it a few days earlier. Once it came UPS, (it was a big box)he hauled it to the entrance hallway where he had cleaned out a nice closet to put it in. He even put a welcome mat outside the closet door leading to the Port-O-Potty. After a few days, he decided to get another one for the upstairs master bath. After more success, he decided to get 2 more, one for the guest bathroom and one for the backyard. The one in the backyard had a birdbath out side it to wash your hands in. That Hue was pretty clever. All the parties Hue hosted got lots of comments on his new Port-O-Potty bathrooms. He wasn't sure if they were compliments or not, but he got more just to please everybody if there were compliments. A few months after their first arrival, it was September now, all 9 plastic toilets got little (please excuse the gross humor ahead) toilet mints and air fresheners to complement the nice stinky aroma that hung around the bathrooms. Finally, a year after the toilets arrival, all 17 of them, as that was how many there were now, got there contents pumped out. The pump guy said a cleaning was long overdue. Obviously the health department got involved. All they did was send a lecturing letter to Hue and that was the end of it. Most of Hue's friends like to joke about his Port-O-Potties. Some called him obsessed, others called him a collector of all things Lu. (If you don't know what the Lu is, it's another name for bathroom, most commonly used in England. Refer to the "Skip to my Lu" song for more information. But that is exactly what Hue did. He started collecting Port-O-Potties. He moved to another house, and turned his house into a museum of all things Lu, even though all he had were Port-O-Potties, it sounded better. Once his collection grew to 97, he decided to make it a museum. It cost 2$ to enter. There was a small food court for eating lunch. But most of them had already spilled theirs, or weren't hungry anymore. At potty 247 he renamed his facility "Port Potty." It was now a local attraction. Once Hue died, he left all 786 Port-O-Potties to his eldest son Gordon who sold it to Waste Management as a showroom for their products. The End

I promise the posts to come wont be so gruesome and disgusting.

Randomnness at Random! #9 Notice Me

Notice: I don't know if you've noticed. But there is a notice here. And it wants to be noticed So notice it. But know this: if you do not notice the notice, I will notice. And if I notice that you have not bothered to notice this notice, you will suffer the most terrible price: To have to notice this notice was insignificant and not worth your while. But please, keep reading this notice. But before you do, notice how much time reading this notice has taken out of your life. But any way, the notice to be noticed is:................................

Drum roll please...................




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Hi! Thanks for noticing me! Don't forget to notice the notices!

My Perrr'tty Poem for Class

Exploring I go,
Through damp, mossy tunnels.
Stubbed my toe, oh no!
I popped up at the cennals. (Cennals is supposed to ryme with tunnels.)

Back in the hole,
To worlds a-new.
Oh gosh, it's the hole of a mole!
Wait! Just a rabbit, phew! (Moles are blind, why would a rabbit be better? 'Cause there cuddly!

I'm back in the woods now,
It's full of big trees. (Du'h!)
I've stepped in the mud now,
Towel please!

There's a creek nearby,
Splashing water all over.
Moquiteos attracted, here fly,
Then to a field covered in clover.

To the fort,
I've spotted a racoon!
Boy he's short,
I hope we don't go home soon.

Night now, and the owls are out,
All safe in our sleepin' bags.
But now we're running all about,
Giving off a joyfull shout. (It rymes with the one above it.)

Mom's calling for me to come in,
I bolted toward her, oops I tripped!
I think she was just happy I didn't scrape my shin,
She would've been angry for being out so long, lucky I slipped.

Awaiting tomorrow,
All safe in my bed.
I'm filled with sorrow for the day to end, but there's alwayes tomorrow.
I think I'll take a trip to the shed.